Dilemma~

I've been working ever since 27th September 2004. Been away from my family since the day i went to Kuching in 2003. Studied for my MCSE. Gained new experiences, fucked around alot. My dad once told me, 'Son.. you go out and see the world for these coming years. I want you to see what is important yourself. Telling you isn't gonna change your mindset.' Yes daddy.. i know.. and now i've seen it, felt it, tasted it and even hurted myself for that.

Ok.. fast forward 2 years ahead. Today. Daddy called me. He was saying that to ask me to go back there and work for him. Yes.. i know daddy.. Oil and Gas Industry earns big bucks. So big. Till those little kids in the videos of bullying ppl can't even imagine. And for you as a father who never took care of me since i was 2 years old.. got blamed by my grandmother, looked down by my uncles saying that he didn't shed the light for his own son.. saying that him as a father never point his own son in the right direction.. is not a joke to tell. If fact, i understand how he feels. It's not good. My dad has been calling me every once in awhile. and each time he calls. I'm happy. I'm happy in a sense that, he cares for me. Even though after so many years being apart from him. And only seeing him once a year. Maybe twice if i'm lucky as he's on a business trip all the time. His words made me trust him. ALOT. I do trust him. He's my father for christ sake. Takkan expect him to ask me walk down the drain? The dilemma.. Miri or KL ? Work or Life ? Family or GF ? Got in an argument today. She doesn't wanna go to Miri. She said that it was unfair for her as i can be with my family and she don't. If want, both of us don't be with our families. And also.. She doesn't wanna stay with my family as she's concerned of herself being not-ngam with them. As her mom is always quarreling with her grandmother and her father being in the middle. Well.. If someone knoes my grandparents. They'll laugh at other parents. Seriously. My grandfather is THE MAN of the CENTURY. There's no other grandfather like him. NEVER. My grandmother, sometimes she's uptight, but she loved everyone and took care of everyone like a baby. My mother, damn.. there's no other mom like her neither. She runs a pub and calls me a playboy and laugh about it. Tho she loved me and my girlfriend that's for sure. See.. everyone that saw my girlfriend, is very happy and liked her in every way. I don't know why she can't see that. I's very sad for me saying that she doesn't wanna live with my grandparents. I know lar.. you want own house, own car own whateverwhatnot. First.. money mar.. work here.. everyday need to worry.. car enough petrol or not.. got enough money to eat or not.. aiya.. wanna do facial ar.. aiyoo.. got dinner coming but no night gown.. whatever lah.. i'm just trying to make a point here.. since then.. i'm in the middle already.. even before going back to Miri. Sigh.